AskImamDarul Iftaa Mahmudiyyah (AskImam)

What are the consequences of going against one's istikhara to please one's parents and family?

Fatwa 3607English
Marriage & DivorceMarriage (Nikah)

Question

I recently e-mailed you about a problem I have.I want to marry a christian lady who is elder than me and has 3 kids.My parents are totally against it and have told me to choose between them and her.i've performed istikhara on numerous occasions about marrying her and all have been very positive.I have decided to please my parents and called it off with her.This goes against my istikharas.What would and could the consequences of this be.I'm also so desperate to make her a muslim,an interest she she so greatly has from her own side.We both are totally devastated.Kindly advice and I also sincerely ask for your duas for me and her,especially her that she indeed be guided to islam.

Answer

Istikhaara is not an order of Allah Ta'ala. It is to seek His guidance in a doubtful situation, therefore, there is no sin in not following the Istikhaara.

You may discuss the outcome of your Istikhaara with your parents. However, to please one's parents in choosing a wife is also an act of virtue and merit. If you are unable to marry the Christian female, you should guide her to IPCI to understand and accept Islam. Not being able to marry her should not deter the effort of accepting Islam.

and Allah Ta'ala Knows Best

Mufti Ebrahim Desai
FATWA DEPT.

Answered by
Mufti Ebrahim Desai
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