How does Allah (sw) likes human being(muslims) to get married?

Question

In my culture when somebody gets marry they have music dancing and women and men together. I tell my family taht this is haraam. They just get get angry at me. So i dont talk. A Kurdish family had a wedding and my family was invited to it. I told my family that it was haraam to go to the wedding where there is music,dancing and women and men together but they act as if it is not haraam or nothing. I love my family though. They think that their way is correct and my way is wrong. My life is terrible.Even my cousin who is almost an Iman went to the wedding.He admitted that wedding is wrong too. Am i going crazy? or they are? Where is a good place to go to worshipp god and forget this worldy life? Thank you very much. may Allah reward you for this work. Ameen

Mufti Ebrahim Desai · Accepted Answer

1. Kindly refer below our standard reply to similar queries. 1. There are two aspects here: One is I'elaam (to inform) and the other is I'emaal (to make others practice). Informing is merely a means of making others practice. The purpose (to make others practice) should be placed first and then wisdom should be applied in trying to achieve the purpose. 2. Music is expressly prohibited in many Ahaadith. Among the dominant purposes of our beloved Prophet (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam) was to destroy musical instruments. (Mishkat vol.2).
3. We advise you associate with the Ulama and pious people of your locality and work towards establishing an Islamic environment. By associating with pious people and more so in the effort of establishing a Deeni environment, it is more likely you will achieve your purpose of maintaining your faith and being Shari'ah compliant.

and Allah Ta'ala Knows Best

Mufti Ebrahim Desai
FATWA DEPT.

1. Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam) advised to perform the Nikah in the Musjid. Performing the Nikah in the hall is against the Sunnah. It is improper for the learned people to perform the Nikah there.
2. Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam) said, 'The most blessed Nikah is the one with least expenses.' Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam) also said, 'Simplicity is from Imaan.' To have the Nikah in a hall compounded with a banquet is expensive. That is extravagance. Allah Ta'ala says,. 'The extravagant ones are the brothers of the Shaytaan.' Such monies may be given away to the married couple or saved for a mose useful purpose. 3. Islam prohibits intermingling of sexes. It is highly immoral for the bride to be in the hall in open view of all and sundry. How many men may be casting lustful glances on the bride? She is the central figure of the occasion. How many females may be admiring the groom? The evils in an intermingling gathering are too many to enumerate. In brief, it is death to one's spirituality.

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