Converting and marrying a married Muslim man...What would the procedure be for him to take me as a second wife? Does he have to ask her permission?

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I am in love with a Muslim who is also in love with me, he is married but unfortunately his wife is not very well mentally. I am willing to convert to Muslim, I am also married, not by the church (seperated for one year, not legally). What would the procedure be for him to take me as a second wife? Does he have to ask her permission? Would he have to explain how/when we fell in love? Please help me understand how we stand within the Islam?

1SOCIAL DEPT · Accepted Answer

Thank you for the questions which you have submitted to the institute. Please do forgive me for the delay in responding sooner.

I am pleased that you have decided to accept Islam and my prayer is that you will seriously study this beautiful religion which was revealed over 1400 years ago. You will find that guidelines have been laid down for every aspect of life for every man and woman. So do consider reading the Quran (in English) and equip yourself with knowledge which will empower you as a Muslim but more especially, as a Muslim woman who has a high status and standing in the court of our Creator.

You ask if your intended husband has to get his first wive's permission to marry again. He doesn't have to. However, it would be kinder to inform her at some stage. There is no need to go into details when he informs her. It is important that he uses wisdom, kindness and tact in telling her. You mention that she is mentally ill. He will have to consider her mental state and what affect it will have on her. Am I correct in assuming that he will not divorce his wife but that you are willing to be a second wife as it is allowed in Islam?

Another very important aspect you should be aware of is that he will have to

treat both of you equitably in all aspects of your lives. This means he has to spend equal time with both of you; make an equitable financial distribution in whatever he supplies, it has to be the same for both of you etc.

You would obviously have to clear your side as far as your legal divorce is concerned. It is best that whilst you are waiting to clear these formalities you meet with Muslim sisters and learn more about Islam. You can contact sisters4dawaah@yahoo.com to see if there is anyone in your area who will hopefully assist you.

I hope I have answered your questions satisfactorily. You are welcome to write again if you need more clarification. May both of you be guided by Allah Ta'ala, ameen.

and Allah Ta'ala Knows Best

1SOCIAL DEPT.

CHECKED AND APPROVED: Mufti Ebrahim Desai

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