I love a Muslim girl & I am Muslim myself. I love her a lot & I want her to know how much I love her & how much I care about her
Question
I love a Muslim girl & I am Muslim myself. I love her a lot & I want her to know how much I love her & how much I care about her. I came to know that she is not that good (she is not shareef) , she has committed some wrong doings but I don?t know even after knowing still I still love her ?.& I pray to Allah that may Allah make her walk on right path & that make her leave what she had done in past? & I want to tell you that I also had committed some wrong doings (I had not done sex but I had used my penis to spit out the liquid from it when I used to see nude pics or movies).But now I have left this wrong path & So I want to ask you that what should I read (DUA?A) to make myself leave the wrong path completely forever & not to commit the crime I had done in past & that I want that the girl I love to leave the wrong doings so what should I read (DUA?A) that to make her leave the wrong doings. & I want to marry her so what should I read (DUA?A) as I pray for all these things in every prayer & the thing is that I am a student myself & I cant afford to marry her now but I want that my engagement to be arranged with her so that I can continue my studies & that so that I don?t have to worry about her? SO WHAT SHOULD I READ (DUA?A) OR WHAT SHOULD I RECITE (WHICH SURA?H) SO THAT SHE LEAVES THE WRONG PATH & THAT SHE TO BE ENGAGED WITH ME AS I CAME TO KNOW THAT HER PARENTS WANT TO ENGAGE HER SOMEWHERE ELSE & AS I LOVE HER A LOT & I DON?T WANT TO LOSE HER.
Answer
Jazakallah for writing to the institute about your present dilemna. You desire a certain woman to become your prospective wife.
An engagement between a man and a woman in Islam is not acceptable. When you are ready for marriage and your match is found, your nikah has to be performed as soon as possible. The concept of getting engaged and then meeting with and mingling with a fiancee is not part of the Islamic culture. As long as a woman is not your wife and therefor not your mahram, you have no right to be alone with her. Nor should you be gazing at her or desiring her in your heart. If you have a problem with this, you should fast constantly to appease and control your desires.
You say you are still studying. This means you are not in a position to support a wife at the moment. You also state that her parents want her to marry someone else. If this is the case, then you have no right to go and present yourself as a prospective husband. This action is against to the teachings of Nabi (sallallaahu alayhi wassallam) and will displease Allah Ta'ala greatly. Allah Ta'ala has set aside a partner for you so do not interfere with someone (**** Mufti, is it correct to say this? )else's taqdir. Only the woman whom Allah Ta'ala has set aside for you will be your wife. Allow me to suggest that whilst you are studying, you set aside a few hours a week to study more about the commandments of Allah Ta'ala. Study the Quran in depth so that you become more conversant with your Islamic duties, responsibilities, obligations, what is halaal/haraam etc.
Insha'allah, when you seek knowledge of deen which will take you closer to Allah Ta'ala, His mercy will descend on you. You should rather concentrate on arming youself with knowledge which will benefit you in this world and the hereafter. In this way you will be able to cast off whatever bad habits you have. This will also help to prepare you towards seeking a pious partner. Perform your five daily salaah without fail, increase the performance of nafl salaah, especially tahadjud salaah, zikr, istigfaar, and recitation of the Holy Quran and read it with understanding.
All Muslims are guided to seek pious partners who have the fear and love of Allah Ta'ala in their hearts. You will insha'llah be granted a pious wife who will be a joy to you in this world and the hereafter. Ameen.
And Allah Ta'ala knows best.
Wassalaam
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CHECKED AND APPROVED: Mufti Ebrahim Desai
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