Should I reveal the evil of my colleague to the relatives of the girl he is going to marry or is this considered backbiting?
Question
One of my office colleague is going to marry. Once, some relatives of the bride came to office to collect information about the bridegroom (my colleague). They were asking so many things about him. Now, if anything bad about him known to me then what should I do? Conceal or disclose it? Should revealing his evil will be considered as backbiting? Or, after concealing his evil I will be guilty for hiding the truth.
Answer
In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful
As-salāmu ʿalaykum wa-raḥmatullāhi wa-barakātuh
If you are certain that your colleague presently has some evil habits or conduct that will be detrimental to the marriage, then you should not conceal the truth about your colleague to the family of the girl who intends marrying him. This will not be considered backbiting, but rather it would be regarded as advising the girl and assisting her in being forewarned of any possible harm she is likely to face if she happens to marry your colleague.[1]
And Allah Taʿālā Knows Best
Mahmood Patel
Student, Darul Iftaa
Azaadville, South Africa
Checked and Approved by
Mufti Ebrahim Desai
References (Arabic / Urdu sources)
[1] قَالَ الْعُلَمَاءُ: تُبَاحُ الْغِيبَةُ فِي كُلِّ غَرَضٍ صَحِيحٍ شَرْعًا حَيْثُ يَتَعَيَّنُ طَرِيقًا إِلَى الْوُصُولِ إِلَيْهِ بِهَا كَالتَّظَلُّمِ وَالِاسْتِعَانَةِ عَلَى تَغْيِيرِ الْمُنْكَرِ وَالِاسْتِفْتَاءِ وَالْمُحَاكَمَةِ وَالتَّحْذِيرِ مِنَ الشَّرِّ وَيَدْخُلُ فِيهِ تَجْرِيحُ الرُّوَاةِ وَالشُّهُودِ وَإِعْلَامُ مَنْ لَهُ وِلَايَةٌ عَامَّةٌ بِسِيرَةِ مَنْ هُوَ تَحْتَ يَدِهِ وَجَوَابُ الِاسْتِشَارَةِ فِي نِكَاحٍ أَوْ عَقْدٍ مِنَ الْعُقُودِ. (فتح الباري لابن حجر (10/ 472))
(أَوْ لِلتَّحْذِيرِ) أَيْ تَحْذِيرِ الْغَيْرِ (مِنْ شَرِّهِ أَوْ التَّعْرِيفِ كَالْأَعْرَجِ وَنَحْوِهَا) قِيلَ كَذِكْرِ عَيْبِ مَبِيعٍ يَكْتُمُ عَيْبَهُ وَذِكْرِ عَيْبِ امْرَأَةٍ يُرَادُ نِكَاحُهَا وَلَا يَعْلَمُ عَيْبَهَا فَإِنَّهُ مِنْ النُّصْح الْوَاجِبِ. (بريقة محمودية في شرح طريقة محمدية (3/ 187))
- Answered by
- Mahmood Patel
- Checked & approved by
- Mufti Ebrahim Desai
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